What to Do When You're Stuck, Episode 17
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In this episode Lizzie and Justin talk together about stuckness - what it is, how our efforts to deny it or overcome it can end up being unhelpful, and the deep quality of welcome that's required for stuckness to flower into whatever it is that it is an opening for. The source for our conversation, written by Lizzie, is below.
Stuck
What to do when you’re feeling completely stuck.
In all of our lives there are times when we feel stuck, paralysed or unable to shift a pattern or move forward. You know when you’re stuck because:
Your thinking is circular and you convince yourself of how bad things are or how there’s no way out.You feel frustrated and even bored with the same old issue, person, circumstance or pattern.You feel tension in your body, a compression of some kind that is nagging and underlying.You’re unable to do anything to change this, it really does feel like you’re stuck, physically immobilised around whatever it is you’re facing.
I’ve discovered that being stuck is actually a huge invitation. You know there’s something more, something in the future that you just can’t get to - that there has to be something better than this stuck feeling of nothing moving, of not going anywhere.
And that’s because you are being invited deeper, and not forward. Forward is not what’s needed in this moment, but deepening, relaxing and seeing what the stuckness wants from you can be a graceful and conscious way through to whatever the gifts are that await you.
Being stuck, when we attend to it fully and stop trying to change it or avoid it, is a gift, a calling from inside of you to stop, go inwards, become intimate with this feeling inside and consciously relax into it to see what it wants.You can even ask it some questions - Dear Stuck Feeling:
What is it that you want to say to me ?Which part of my body can I relax a little more so I can get closer to you to really see what you are trying to communicate to me ?How are you trying to serve me now ?What am I denying or avoiding right now that would have you feel heard and seen ?
See where you get to. See what this stuck feeling wants to say. Treat it like a young child who is tugging on your skirt / trousers for some attention and a cuddle. Look into that child’s eyes and really, truly asks what would help, what the child needs, how you can attend to them.
– Lizzie Winn
Photo by Federico Beccari on Unsplash